Painting is ruining my body.

So I was coerced into helping build a shed a few weeks ago with the promise of Warmachine as payment. I had asked if I could be paid in money as I was deep in debt to the local branch of the Hell’s Angels and any amount would help me keep the organs that they had threatened to relieve me of should I not pay them. He said I was working for Warmachine or for free, it was my choice, so I took the Warmachine.

I tried explaining that to Ulrich whom I owed the money to and asked if he could be paid in pewter. He responded by spitting in my face and throwing me down a flight of concrete stairs. As I lay at the bottom of the stairs groaning and wiping the spit – more nicotine than saliva, really – from my face, I began to laugh. “You fool!” I gurgled, “You’ve damaged my organs beyond repair! What worth are they to you now? No one will buy them!” He proceeded to spend the next few minutes explaining that they weren’t literally going to harvest my organs but rather it was an extreme example of physical punishment that could be exacted upon me should I not fulfill my half of the contract. He added a lengthy list of other punishment I could endure in place of the removal of my internal organs, most of which involved smashing my testicles and penis with a roofing hammer.

As I was bleeding so profusely from the ears he started to feel bad and declared being thrown down a stairwell was payment enough for the ten bus tickets he had bought me the week before. Later at the hospital the doctor would proclaim that I was the first person ever to by on every single organ donation waiting list. As such I had plenty of down time to paint the in progress and new pieces that I had which were holding up my non-Warmachine related art.

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I’ve had the Kayazay’s since Adepticon and have been slowly working on them for a while but didn’t work on them in earnest until I got the Underboss. He makes them substantially better as a unit even though he really looks like he doesn’t want to be there. Come on, brah! Being in club photos is part of being in the club!

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Sylys and Gorman had been on my ‘to-get’ list for a while. Gorman is almost worth getting just for his Black Oil attack and I feel like Sylys will be better caster support than War Dog. As interesting and adorable as War Dog is, I feel like Sylys has more utility. I’ll have to do another layer of sand on their bases though as the first layer is a little thin.

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And then there’s this dude. PoW 15 weapon master? That’s a no brainer. Like dating a girl with a full sleeve: she’ll probably do butt stuff.

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I added a little bit of grunge to Marc’s already painted wreck markers. Nothing crazy. I have the unpainted Menoth wreck markers but I don’t have the colours necessary to paint them. I could mix up a close match but…ugh…. effort.

 

5 thoughts on “Painting is ruining my body.

  1. Looking good, Aaron! Love what you’ve done with my wreck markers… and I’m happy to lend you the required paints for my Menoth ones too!

    As for the Kayazy… they look appropriately terrifying!

  2. I would think that Hell’s Angels wouldn’t be averse to some Warmachine. Still best not to take chances 😉

    Well done! The Man-O-War looks especially awesome! Lovin’ the vials on Gorman as well!

  3. I thoroughly enjoyed this write up, probably one of the best write ups for a painting post yet 🙂

    I really enjoy the MOW Kovnik, the Greyish tone is really set off with the red flag and the gold on the axe.

    I also agree with your assessment of Sylys. He works great with Irusk. The free upkeep and +2″ to spell is a huge bonus (especially for our non-arc node faction).

  4. Geez, if you were in that deep just come to me next time. I at least understand the value of a good liver 😉 Good looking stuff!

    • I think Aaron’s was already pretty well used… although, I suppose you could also say that it was frequently exercised? Does one exercise a liver? I mean, it was used so often that it’s probably stronger than your average liver, right?

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